It’s a bird, a plane, it’s… your own mind. What is this persistent feeling of doom darkening what should be one of the best times of your life?
Homesickness is defined as ‘longing for home and family while absent from them.’ It’s a particular type of illness, one we’ve all felt before.
If this is you, here’s what to do if you feel homesick-
What is Homesickness?
Homesickness is that feeling we get when our heart is swimming in the past and believe that ‘the good days’ can be resurrected via a return to the comfort and safety of home.
It’s a tender kind of hurt. One that reminds you of your most visited restaurants and how your loved ones feel when they hug you.
Homesickness is a universal experience and never anything to feel ashamed of.
Every traveler ever, since the dawn of time, since we humans first started embarking on epic journeys away from home, has felt the sting of homesickness.
Note: Some people are more prone to homesickness than others, such as those who are anxiously attached or have abandonment issues.
What Triggers Homesickness?
Anything that links us to home can trigger homesickness- people, scents, objects, colors, things that make us feel nostalgic.
However, homesickness does not wait for a sign in your environment.
Other things that trigger homesickness include feelings of guilt (especially around leaving responsibilities like your business, kids, or pets), anxiety around money, feeling alone, or the fear of missing out on events at home.
What To Do if You Feel Homesick: 11 Clever Tips
Remember why you left
Remember why you embarked on this epic journey in the first place.
When you planned this trip, you had goals and dreams. You were excited about finally crossing the Grand Canyon off your bucket list or swimming with sea turtles in The Virgin Islands.
Think about that feeling which compelled you to leave home. Channel how you felt at that moment.
Even if the magic is somewhat broken by the current situation or your expectations weren’t met, try to return to that person who bravely left home.
How did you feel, and what were you looking for?
See the beauty in your environment
Take a moment to look around you and identify with your physical senses. What do you smell, hear, feel, and see?
What’s beautiful about the space that you’re in right now? You may never be at this location again. Even if you are, it won’t be the same moment.
So be here with all your might.
Look for the familiar
One of the beauties of travel is learning how people are both similar and different worldwide, and the ultimate realization is that we are all just human.
No matter where you’re from or where you’re at, you can find something familiar about where you are.
A few ideas to spark your imagination:
- Wear your favorite clothes that you brought from home
- Look for foods from back home in restaurants or even a favorite candy from the gas station
- Put on your headphones and listen to your favorite music. How lucky are we to live at a time when we can take our music with us wherever we go?
- Find ways to incorporate your daily routines from home
- Wear a piece of jewelry that reminds you of home or someone you miss
- Enjoy the smells of home with a Homesick Candle. You can also pack your favorite perfume to remember fun nights out with friends
Plug into home
Good news: between phones, email, and social media, there is always a lifeline home. Call your best friend, text your parent, or chime in with your online community.
Loneliness is a state of mind.
You can feel lonely wherever you are, even in your own home, surrounded by the familiar. And you can feel complete wherever you are, even in the middle of a foreign place.
Unplug from social media
Social media can make us feel connected in many ways, but intrinsically, we all know there is a limit to the depth of those connections. Filling your mind with superficiality, in the form of internet relationships and photoshopped photos of strangers that appear to have the perfect life and skin, is not healthy for you, ever.
But if you’re feeling homesick, social media can be especially toxic. Personally, when I want to escape the pull of Insta but still be able to zone out via scrolling, I use Pinterest, which fills me with ideas and inspiration rather than envy and sadness.
Connect with locals
Wherever you go, there you are. One thing to do if you feel homesick and longing for connection is to make friends where you are.
Put effort into meeting new people on your tour or in the common spaces of your hostel.
Making new friends and memories and actually experiencing the world around you are some of the best things to do if you feel homesick.
Meeting locals adds a layer of authenticity to your travels and staves away homesickness by reminding us that we’re all human.
Find familiarity in a new place
One of the things that we find so comforting about home is how familiar everything feels. Even if you’re only traveling for a few days, find something familiar that you can stick to.
Can you start the day with coffee at the same spot next to your hotel? Can you watch the sunset from your room every night? Find something small to make yours.
Talk it out with yourself
Wondering what to do if you feel homesick but everyone is asleep in a different timezone? One word: Journaling.
Ok, I know you’ve heard of journaling as a cure for pretty much everything, but that’s because it kinda is.
When we write (or type) our situation out, we are forced to think about it differently. We are also turning our attention to doing something rather than just being consumed by our thoughts.
Journal prompts to start with
- What do I love about (where you are)?
- What am I learning right now?
- How will this trip influence future travel?
- Write about your favorite travel experience
- Write a bucket list of things to do in your current location
Note: If you have any journal prompts that have helped you, I’d love to hear them, please share in the comments!
Skip the guilt
Guilt gets me every time, a sure recipe for homesickness. You might feel guilty because-
- You left the people you cared about behind, and you’re not there to help them with XYZ
- Your (friend, family member, pet) only has so long to live, and you’re wasting time you could be spending with them
- Important moments are happening without you
Here’s what to do if you feel homesick guilt:
Remember: There is no reason to feel guilty about pursuing your dreams or goals.
You’re responsible for your own happiness in this life.
The people you love want you to be happy, and only you can make that a reality.
Yes, you will miss some significant events.
Yes, you will miss some beautifully mundane moments.
What you will gain is knowledge, understanding, and self-advancement that becomes a gift to the ones you love.
Think of your situation as temporary
One of my panic attack mantras is:
“You never have to do this again.”
That phrase reminds me that I never have to be in this situation again once I get through my dilemma. If wherever you are is truly that awful, you never have to do it again once you’re back home.
But by the time you get safely back home, you’ll already be flooded with good memories and a special brand of ‘not’ homesickness for the place you left.
Forums and support groups
Trust me, you’re not the first person to Google ‘what to do if you feel homesick.’ Find online forums where you can either post about how you’re feeling or discuss it with others. If you don’t feel up to posting, dig around for past questions that other users have asked about homesickness.
How to Prevent Homesickness
If you’re wondering if you can skip homesickness altogether, the answer (no) will likely disappoint you. However, there are a few things you can do to prevent and prepare for homesickness before your trip, and here they are:
- Prepare for adventure. Before traveling, take time to research and familiarize yourself with the destination’s cultures and customs. This lowers the chances of being caught off guard by something wildly different from what you’re used to.
- Expect it. Preventing homesickness also means expecting it to happen. Instead of hoping you’ll suddenly stop being homesick when you travel, create a checklist of familiar essentials to pack.
- Nurture your network. It’s important to focus on strengthening the connections with people you love every day. Having a support network in place is the best way to deal with the isolation that comes with homesickness. But that support network is built in your daily life and is something you continually build upon, so start today.
- Embrace positivity. If you’re a chronic homesickness sufferer like me, it’s important to approach that fact with a positive attitude. Keep an open mind and be kind to yourself. Frame your moment of longing as a chance for personal growth and self-discovery, recognizing that challenges come along with every trip.
With those 3 easy tips, you can help ease the strain of longing for home.
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